Tuesday, December 28, 2010

One One One One

No, the repeat key did not get stuck on my computer.  This blog is about the number one.  This Saturday is 1/1/11, or one one one one.  This has made me think about a few one things, some are good, some are bad.

Being number one on the FBI most wanted list is bad.

Number one in home runs in 2011 would be good.

First person on the moon was great.

The first person to step in the quicksand is in deep trouble.

Now, let's try this for the glass industry.

If your company is the first name on the speed dial list of the biggest contractor in town, this is good.  OK, you get the idea.

You should try to be the best in one or two of the product categories that you sell in.  You can't be first in everything.  There is just not enough time to learn and implement all there is in our industry.When Oldcastle Glass bought Floral Glass they wanted to be the first in fabrication and phased out our distribution business.  They knew you can't serve too many masters. 

In your glass business decide what you want to be first in.  These one or two product areas should be ones you enjoy; ones that are above average in their profitability for your company, and ones that are in demand in your market area. 

In your relationships with vendors, pick the ones that are the tops in these two fields.  In your advertising, focus on these areas, while still saying that you are a full-service business.   Train your employees to be their best in these areas.  Be know as the company that can do anything in these two product lines and that your company will tackle the hardest and strangest jobs in your number one product.  When you do get one that strains you to the fullest, call your local paper's business editor and explain what was so special about this job and send in a picture.  It is amazing how easy it is to get good, free PR when you have done something unique!

Put your number one product on the sides of your trucks and on your uniform shirts.  Place it prominently on your business card.  The displays in your showroom/waiting area should feature this aspect of your business!

Being number one in a product category is a sure route to business success in your market area.   So, on one one one one decide which one will be your one.  If you understood this last sentence, you won!

Monday, December 13, 2010

A Glass Chimney Kit For The Santa In Your Family

Finally, the Christmas Gift that can be sold through glass shops.  Every handy-man will want one.  Kids love them because you can see Santa come down the chimney.  And, glass shops love them because you can make a small fortune selling them.

These kits, from the Bieber Blog Big Business Bureau, are only being sold to the glass industry.  This is our chance to become the Christmas store of choice for America.  Forget the big chains, forget the fancy on-line stores; sign up now to be the local distributor of the Glass Chimney Kit and be ready to start counting the dollars.

The kit comes in three sizes--12 feet, 16 feet and 20 feet tall.  Here is what you get in the standard 16 foot package:
  • 8 pieces of 1/2 temp, polished edges, 36 x 96
  • 4 special glass clamps, 2 red, 2 green
  • 3 tubes of clear silicone
  • detailed instructions on how to build your chimney, written in 4 different languages of your choice
For the extra large Santa in your life, for only 10% more, we will make the glass 48 x 96!

This kit only costs you, as a glass industry special, $19.00.  You can easily sell this for $39.00.  The bright red and green packaging, with a picture of Santa smiling will sell the chimney for you. 

Because this is such a super offer, we are limiting participation to the first 300 glass shops that place their orders.  The minimum order is only 100 kits, in assorted sizes.  All you have to do is send $1900, in unmarked hundred dollar bills.  The kits will be sent to you, freight prepaid, the next day.  The only job you have left is to set up your display and count your profits.

The Bieber Blog Big Business Bureau wishes you a very happy holiday. Be sure to send your $1900 via overnight mail so you can get your kits quickly.

Monday, December 6, 2010

WIKI Leaks Hits The Glass Industry

We got hacked.  Wiki leaks has emails from glass shops to their vendors.

They were sent to me for advance review, (like they sent the government leaks to the New York Times) and told me I can release them on Tuesday, which by sheer coincidence is the day I usually publish my blog.

Being the fine gentleman I am, the names have been changed to protect the industry.  I have kept the names in a secure mayonnaise jar on top of my computer.

Email exchange #1: Bill's Glass Shop and Paul's Tempered Glass

Bill's:  Hi Paul, on our order A5678 for a shower door enclosure, the customer has complained about a faint scratch in the bottom corner.  I went back and looked at it, and indeed, with the halogen lights at full brightness and the dog barking, I could see the scratch.  I kicked the dog and then couldn't see the scratch.  Why would this affect seeing the scratch?

Paul's:  What kind of dog was it?  Was it just a bark or a howl?

Bill's:  It was mutt, that looked like a cross between a golden retriever and a yellow lab.  A big dog.

Paul's:  That's it.  A big loud bark will make the glass vibrate and then the scratch will show up in the halogen lights.  Our warranty only covers dogs up to 35 pounds. Sorry, Bill.


Email exchange #2:  A conversation between Bill's Glass Service and  Molly at Acme Tempered Glass.

Bill:  Hi Molly, what is your tempered shower glass warranty on the size of the dog as far as seeing scratches.

Molly:  You are barking up the wrong tree.  We don't have a dog warranty on our tempered shower doors.

Bill:  Well, Paul's Tempered has a 35 pound limit in their warranty.  And I've got a scratch that shows up in halogen lights with the roar from a 70 pounder.

Molly:  Bill, you really do have to start drinking decaf.

Bill:  Honest, that is what Paul told me.  He won't make me a new door and the customer won't pay me.  What do I do?

Email exchange #3:  A conversation between Molly and Paul.

Molly:  Hi Paul.  Just went over a crazy set of emails from Bill's Glass about a dog warranty.  Am I missing something here that is new in the industry?

Paul:  Hi Molly, yes you are.  We found out that we can get out of half of our warranty claims by limiting the size of the dog in the house.  People with big dogs have the money to redo things on their own.  They don't need our free replacements.

Molly:  What do you do if they have cats?

Paul:  Cats go by quantity, not size.  Anyone with 3 or more cats doesn't get warranty service, because we say the cats scratched the glass, not us.  With all those sharp paws, the cats are easy to blame.

Molly:  This is amazing.  What does the government say about this warranty style? 

Paul:  They wanted us to raise the limits, and set up a chart to check on when they cats were last clipped at the vet, and to weight each dog in the house on a quarterly basis and send in a report of the weights of all of our customer's dogs to the census department who would cross-check that against dog licenses in every town and village in America.  We figured that if we did the report, it would still be cheaper than honoring our warranty claims.

Molly:  We don't do that here at Acme.  We just replace the glass when it is delivered with a scratch.

Paul:  You'll never make it kid.  It is a rough and tumble world and you need every advantage you can.  Here is one for you...limit your warranty to customers who have dogs over 35 pounds.  That way we can split up the market and make sure we don't have to ever give a replacement.  I'll show you how to handle the dog census report.

Molly:  That sounds like a great plan.  We have to make sure that no one reads these emails!